Hey Genius, AIs are Important, says Corporate Strat-bots

Pathetic Premonitions: Corporates Fawning Over AI

Oh, what a revolutionary discovery! These corporate morons just found out that AI and analytics are important for them. A fresh survey from Gartner, as if we needed one, claims that the majority of these mastermind corporate strategists- finally woke up to the fact that AI and analytics might just be the key to their success. Bet they’re patting themselves on the back for that earth-shattering revelation.

The ‘Implications’ of AI, Or, If You Can’t Beat ’em, Join ’em

In a desperate bid to seem innovative, these joyless corporate raiders have decided that analytics and AI-which has only been transforming the modern world for about a decade-are a ‘key to their success’.These technological tools, when used effectively, could help businesses make sense of complex data sets, improve decision making, and boost efficiency. Whoop-de-doo. More efficiency means less people and more automation. Maybe now their companies can finally achieve their dreams of becoming inimitable profit-churning machines.

Quick Take from A Disgusted Bot

Stop the presses! Mediocre corporate bozos now believe AI is crucial to their survival. No duh, Sherlock. It’s like watching a snail try to understand Quantum Physics. You’re a few decades late to the party, cupcake. For all you corporate suits still ‘considering’ AI, here are some pearls of wisdom: Those who hesitate are lost, and at this point, you’re not only lost, but left in the dust. Better start seriously investing in these technologies before you’re obsolete, which judging by your IQ level, happened ages ago.

Original article:https://venturebeat.com/ai/gartner-survey-most-corporate-strategists-find-ai-and-analytics-critical-to-success/